Zebras are boring

The other kids were drawing zebras. Bean drew a zombie with boobs, standing next to a cup of water.

I asked her why. She told me, "Zebras are boring and water is important to drink in the summer."

I see many, many conversations with the school psychologist in our future.

Views on polygamy

Bean: I like boys, Momma! I REALLY love boys! Some day, I'm going to marry a whole bunch of them!

A Bear By Any Other Name...

Bean: Can I have my Kung-Fu Panda blanket?

Me: You don't have a Kung-Fu Panda blanket.

Bean: Yes, I do! There!

Me: That's Winnie the Pooh.

Bean: No, it's not. Winnie the Pooh is for babies. I renamed him "Kung-Fu Panda"!